What we didn't see in the game!
by ImJustNutty
Summary: Different insane events that we didn't see in the game! Including the tale of Athlum's Sweethearts, the Last Opera, and many, many more! DavidXEmmy, One sided RushXEmmy. NO rushXdave.
1. A Reason for Anything!

**Pardon my temporary fangirlishness. It won't take long.**

**THEY MADE A LAST REMNANT SECTION! THEY MADE A LAST REMNANT SECTION!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!**

**While you are reading this, I'm still trying to figure out a story to write. I'm currently halfway through the game, only have to defeat...that...FREAKIN...GATES OF HELLLLLLLLLL!!! It is SOOO HELLISH!**

**o0o0o0o0o**

"_I'll help you save your sister, no matter what it takes!" _Dave had said.

Now Rush was curious. More than curious. He had never met the Marquis of Althum, and probably didn't even know the guy's first name before this whole mess came about.

Now this guy, this top shot dude who was the ruler of a country was willing to help him, a nobody, a commoner, to solve a kidnapping?

Well, maybe Dave had some sort of sixth sense. Rush stifled a laugh as the thought of Dave, his serious face, and a vision that the whole thing would turn out to be a conspiracy centering around the Sykes.

Rush's mind kept straying to a very strange possibility. He tried to push it away. But it kept coming back.

_He's after the heart of your sister!_

Maybe Rush read too much fanfiction. Maybe he was just the overprotective nii-san (older brother in Japanese) of Irina.

Then the smarter part of Rush (yes, that very, very, VERY small section we hardly get to see in the game) scoffed. _Don't be ridiculous, Rushy _(Apparently the 'smart' side had strange pet names for people) _Davey _(see?)_ is like, what, nineteen?! And Irina's fourteen! Use you head, you dum-dum Rushy..._

Gee, what was I doing, then? Oh wait, I can't use my head...it hurts when I do, thought Rush, sarcastically, as he brought up the glass of juice to his lips, which a servant had brought to the room that Dave had assigned to him. Then the paranoid part (also known as the not so smart part) retorted with the most brilliantest of ideas.

_If he's not after Irina...then he's after...you!_

Rush spewed out the juice. At this brilliant moment, Dave entered the room.

Yup. Rush Sykes, officially the first guy to spew juice over an important ruler of a city. (If I'm wrong, correct me)

Despite the fact that David Nassau, Marquis of Althum, was obviously quite the macho guy type, he screamed. Okay, fine. 'Yelped' would be more accurate, which sent Emma and Torgal and Blocter (Pagus was in the library...) running into the room, with weapons drawn, yelling, "LORD DAVID!" Which all in all, added to the lovely atmosphere of mass panic.

Finally, the smart part of Rush broke free from the panicked state. "HOLD IT!" Rush screamed. Blocter stopped his weapon right above Dave's head, Emma stopped strangling Rush, Torgal stopped stabbing the juice and glass on the floor like a moron, and a bird chirped in the gardens.

Rush pulled himself away from Emma's insane fingers. He gulped in lungfuls of air, then gathered his thoughts. "What...is...going...on...here." He managed to squeeze out of his squashed voicebox.

Torgal cleaned his blades on the bed, then sheathed them. "We heard Lord David's cry for help. And his front is wet." Dave reddened as he looked down at his stained front.

Finally they managed to get the whole story out, ending off with everyone glaring balefully at Rush.

"Eheh...hehheh...heh? Sorry Dave. Sorry guys." Rush grinned dumbly. The generals snorted and left.

David stayed behind till they left. Then he whipped out the flower that Irina liked, and stuck it out to Rush.

Rush's heart stopped. _OmigoshDaveisgayandhehasthehotsformeeeeeeee......_ was his first thought. "Yess....?" He managed to control his hysterical screaming.

David smiled. "Oh, I thought you might want to keep the flower!"

THUMP

David looked down at the unconscious Rush on the floor. He sighed.

"Servant, please call Lady Emma...or...something...and get this place cleaned!"

**o0o0o0o0o**

**Not quite sure how this is going to turn out...**

**RANDOMNESS!**


	2. Tale of the two Althum Sweethearts

**Yayyayyay I can't believe I've got reviews! More than one! I mean, since last I checked there were only 2 stories here...**

**Anyway I was really super high on the fact that they made a Last Remnant section so I just HAD to add something, then I added that previous super random chapter, because...well, honestly. Why WOULD Dave want to help a mostly nobody? At first I really thought it was because of Irina...then came that damned flower scene.**

**And lastly, YOU IDIOT DAVE. THE MOMENT I PUT YOU INTO MY UNION YOU GOOF OFF AND DIE. WHO CARES IF YOU'RE THE CUTEST MARQUIS EVER?! HUMPH!**

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

The Tale of Althum's two Sweethearts: as told by Rush

Once upon a time, there lived a little boy called David Nassau. He was the son of Althum's Marquis, and was to succeed his father.

Of course, right then, little Dave was only 7, and knew nothing about politics. But right then, Daddy was in the main hall with Uncle Blocter, Uncle Torgal, Little Uncle Pagus and Auntie Emma.

His wet maid dumped him in the garden while she went to make out with he cook. I mean, "fetch important papers for the generals". As if David didn't know better. Sometimes he would peek at the two underlings doing things unsuitable for little Dave's eyes.

But not today. Today, David put on his winning smile and sat in the garden, twirling a pretty pink flower in his hand. He swung his cute little legs over the side of the fountain, where he had first seen _her_ last week...

o0o0o0o0o0o

David cleared his throat. "Excuse me, Rush. But..."cute little legs"?!"

Rush glared annoyed at David. "Do you want to hear the rest of the story or not?"

Blocter sighed. "There's no violence! Where's the violence!"

Rush groaned. "I DID say this was going to be a ROMANCE STORY!!!"

Torgal sighed inwardly. "Just continue the story..."

o0o0o0o0o

...the little boy smiled happily to himself. He was going to see her again! He looked up at the sound of footsteps.

"Emmy! You came!" He exclaimed, acting surprised. David would never have left anything to chance. He had asked his daddy the day before if Aunty Emma was going to bring her daughter.

Emmy smiled. David swooned. She was wearing this gray top with a pale blue skirt, and her hair was down. "Of course I did!"

David remembered his etiquette. He offered the flower to Emmy. "Um, I couldn't find any blue flowers, since I'm guessing that's your favourite colour?"

Emmy was delighted, and took the flower. She leaned over and pecked a little kiss on the boy's cheek, which then proceeded to turn bright red. She then realised the boy was embarrassed, and quickly said, "So...what do you wanna play today?"

Many years passed, happy years spent with Emmy in their little garden world in the palace. David never openly expressed his feelings for Emmy...

o0o0o0o0o0o

David interrupted. "I apologise for this interruption, but I would NEVER be so silent about something as important as matters of the heart..."

Rush scowled. "Will you shut up and let me FINISH!"

o0o0o0o0o0o

...which he regretted, one fine day, 3 days after Emmy's 15th birthday.

"Emmy, why the glum face?"

She sighed, and walked to the fountain. She picked up a leaf and threw it in. "It is in the Honeywell tradition that when we reach a certain age, we have to go and pursue a Remnant."

David's eyes widened. "You're leaving?"

Emmy sighed. "It won't be forever. After that, I must go and train myself to be better than my mother in arts, both mystic and in attacking."

David got more worried. "But...but...you'll come back...right?"

Emmy smiled, faintly and a bit sadly. "It's okay, Dave...I'll come back..."

She leaned over and kissed David on the cheek, turning and running out of the garden, sobbing gently. David's chest hurt inside, watching the pale blue skirt tossing in the gentle wind, out, and away...

o0o0o0o00o

Emmy protested. "Just where did you get the idea of this soppy romance thing?!"

Rush grinned. "From Dave's diary."

David blushed furiously. "WHAT WERE YOU DOING IN MY PRIVATE STUDY?!"

Rush grinned wider. "Reading your diary. Weren't you LISTENING?!"

Emmy groaned. "You ought to lock that room..."

o0o0o0o0o0o

Four years later, David Nassau had become the new Marquis of Althum. He had many matters of the state to take care off, and he even met this totally cool guy called Rush Sykes, who was totally awesome and David totally worshipped him. (This sentence was met by everyone in the room groaning in frustration.)

Unfortunately, after a series of unfortunate events (NO PUN INTENDED), general Emma Honeywell died. David stood over her dead body on the table covered with a white sheet, and thought of how his dear Aunty Emma, who had been like a mother to him since he was 5.

Then there was this strange white light from the corridor. Everyone present turned. And everyone thought they had seen an angel. Had Emma Honeywell returned from the dead to help them?

But David knew who that was. And he really thought it was an angel.

As the newcomer introduced herself as Emma Honeywell the second, his mouth formed the name he had known so well...

_Emmy..._

o0o0o0o0o0o

David and Emmy were staring, shocked at Rush. The 3 generals stared at David and Emmy staring at Rush. Rush had a stupid grin on his face.

"There's more, people!"

o0o0o0o0o0o

So after the big hoo-hah about where to go next, David and Emmy finally had a moment together in the main chamber.

"So...how did your training go?"

Emmy smiled, familiarly to David. "Oh, it's been fine. I've been working on my special arts."

David smiled back. "Great..." Then they fell into an uncomfortable silence.

Then David plucked up his courage. "I've missed you."

Emmy reddened slightly. "Same here. I've even kept that flower to gave to me when we were 7." She proceeded to take out a pressed flower bookmark out of her pocket. "I carry it everywhere I go."

David smiled happily. So maybe he did have a chance after all! To save himself the possible rejection, he leaned in quickly and caught her lips in his.

To his surprise, she kissed back.

And this happened for about one full minute before Rush called from outside. "Let's go, Dave!"

o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o

David was now extremely red in the face. "He..hey! I did not write that in my diary!"

Rush smiled a sly little smile. "Nope, you didn't. But I have first hand evidence."

Emmy grew red with anger and fury. "You were WATCHING US?!"

Thus, this ends the tale of the Althum Sweethearts, with Rush being chased by them, around the palace until the generals restrained them from killing each other.

_The End_

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

**Oh man I love this story! I thought Davma or DavidEmma would be interesting, and as told by Rush, this doesn't make much sense! Pardon any time shift (pun intended!) like the Emma being dead part, but I'm just occupied with killing the gates of hell so...**

**Suggestions for next chapter? Requests are welcome. No yaoi/yuri (gay or lesbian stuff...), and if you think I'm a homophobe, actually not really, but it's more of a morals thing. Before I launch into a heated debate...here's a quote between me and my friend.**

"**Me: DAVID NASSAU is MINE! Kim: Last time you said Bya-chan was yours. Me:...I collect them all!!!"**

Note: Bya-chan is Kuchiki Byakuya from Bleach, the manga/anime. Bya-chan is what me and my friend like to call him.


	3. Caughtphrases and Beach babes

**Whee.**

**I think I'm doing too many romance fics. Honestly. Last time I tried out Angst/Drama in a D. Gray Man chapter, everyone was like, "Don't EVER try that again. Unless you want one less reviewer."**

**Again, I've been banned from the Xbox. And even if I wasn't, I hardly have time. Thus, I shall make this chapter rather short.**

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

"The winner's the one who goes first, yeah?"

Dave winced at this horrid line. Yes, the bunch of them were fighting a group of monsters, and Rush just HAD to bring out his stupid line.

"Rush, I appreciate the attempt to boost morale, but_please_ pick nicer and more sensible lines?"

Just then, one of the creeps snuck up on Dave's division and attacked Dave.

"GASP. How DARE you!" David yelled in his slightly irritatingly calm noble voice as an insensible amount of blood spewed out from his stomach, but miraculously his shirt was unstained.

Rush rolled his eyes. "Like, as if THAT wasn't totally inappropriate for an exclamation, after you've been hit. Something more like, 'YOWCH!', or ...something..."

Then Rush rushed (yes, this is why you shouldn't call your characters things like 'Rush', or 'Dash', or 'Walker'...) toward one of the monsters and delivered a critical blow, which was followed by a horribly pathetic attack from one of the soldiers he'd hired.

"What are you DOING!" Rush demanded, as he dodged a blow.

Dave rolled his eyes. "This is not wise to say if you wish to boost morale!" Then he struck at the enemy.

Suddenly, Blocter yelled, "Mm! That looks...GOOD! Muah...HA!!!"

Rush and Dave exchanged weird looks..."That, Dave, has GOT to be the WORST phrase in this entire game...EVER."

Dave nodded in response. "I have GOT to compose a book of acceptable phrases...and "The winner's the one who goes first, yeah?" is NOT going to be one of them!"

Rush growled. "Ya think I'm gonna let you write a horrid book like THAT?!"

It took both enemy and 3 friendly unions to break the two boys whacking each other with weapons like childish teens...

o0o0o0o0o0o

**This was suggested by Keira-93. Just so you know.**

After the fight, they passed a beach.

"Awesome! A beach!" Rush rushed (SEE WHAT I MEAN?!) toward the sand, tearing off his shirt in the process. Everyone eye twitches.

Rush leapt into the water. David approached warily. "There may be sharks in there..." he mentioned, quietly.

Rush sighed, then splashed water straight into Dave's eyes. Dave had learnt that screaming when something splashed on you was not wise, since it could start World War One (it was a long time ago, right?) in the castle. Instead, he kicked water onto Rush.

After a short water fight, Dave got seriously drenched. Emmy was sunbathing with her boots off, Blocter was swimming about (he's like a fish thing...) and Torgal was...sharpening his knives. Sigh...

Rush sighed. "Dave, you're gonna die from a chill or something. You have GOT to take off that cloak...dress...thingy."

Dave was too shocked about the prospect of having to strip in public, that he ignored Rush's comment about his "Dress thing". "I can't possibly unclothe myself HERE!"

Random fangirl number #342 screams from under the sand. "STRIPTEASE! STRIPTEASE! STRIPTEASE!"

David tensed. "Who said that?"

Rush waved it away. "C'mon...just take it off. There ain't any one who's gonna go...fanatical."

Just then, a wind blew across, chilling David to the bone.

"Eek. Maybe I shall."

"Haha, finally. What, you think I'm some kind of gay perv?"

Dave took off his 'dress' and folded it nicely and placed it on a relatively not so sandy rock. Then he dived into the water next to Rush.

"Oh shoot, I forgot I haven't swam for like, 5 years!" David bubbled as he sank under the water.

Rush rolled his eyes, walked to where Dave sank, and the water was up to his stomach, reached into the water and grabbed a gasping Marquis out of the shallow water.

Dave was washed over with relief (and sea water...mostly the seawater, actually). "I owe you my life, Rush."

Rush sighed. "Dude, you are standing in the shallow bit of the beach, and you're drowning."

Dave looked down, looked at Rush, then looked down. He set down his feet, and heaved a sigh of relief when it touched solid ground/sand.

Rush released the boy's arm. "Right, let's go for a swimming lesson!"

_**At the request of the Marquis of Athlum, the following scenes shall be blocked. Unfortunately, due to the Marquis' limited knowledge of technology, we are able to bring you the audio.**_

"Dave, so swing your arms like this in the water..."

"Like this?"

"-splash- ARGH MY EYES!!!"

"My dearest apologies Rush..."

----

"You're getting it..."

"I am pleased!"

"Now try doing it in the water!"

"..."

"...um, Dave? This is the time you start swimming in the sea?"

"...Ooookay...Rush..."

splash splash.

"...like this, Rush?"

"No, harder! Stronger strokes!"

"...now?"

"HARDER!"

"(splash splash splash) (pant pant) NOW?!"

"HARDER YOU MORONIC MARQUIS! WATER RESISTANCE IS HUGE!"

o0o0o0o0o0o

So they spent their day there. The End.

**o0o0o0o0o0o00o**

**If you didn't get the "WATER RESISTANCE IS HUGE!" bit, it's from this Death Note parody, where Light is splashing in the puddle before he dies...yeah.**

**REVIEW!**


	4. Bad Bugs and Althum Sweethearts II

**Man, of all the fanfics in this section...well, I'm glad that there are an awful lot more, but seriously! Must you ALL WRITE YAOI STUFF?!**

**No offence. I used to think that Dave/Rush was a pretty well fitting pairing, but then, the first few yaoi fics that appeared here was HORRIGIBLE. Honest.**

**Anyway, this chapter is about the severe amount of bugs.**

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

Rush was, predictably, in a battle. This time, he had to save his sister from the _**beeping **_Gates of Hell. This might have been simpler if only that _**beeper of a beeping **_Hermeien hadn't summoned the Hynpons, or Hypnos, or whatever those ragdolls were. He swung his sword and it bounced off the arm of a Hypnos.

"Oh, shitting damn _**BEEPING BEEP **_ of a _**BEEPER BEEPING BEEPEDEBEEPBEEP!**_" Rush swore violently, causing all his union mates to cringe as their ears shrivelled from the intense profanity. The Hypnos swung his arm across Rush's face, sending a ridiculously large amount of blood flying out of...nowhere... his entire body, at the look of it.

Blocter considered this for a moment, as he performed the Mighty Thunderclap III on the Hypnos. "You notice somethin', Rush?"

Rush parried a blow, and finished off one of them. "What?"

Blocter continued, as Emmy's Squad attacked. "Well, when we get attacked, a whole splat of blood falls out, but our clothes _remained sparkly clean!_"

"Hmm, I suppose you're right..."

After a while, David's Division was slaughtered by a spamming of Blue Blazes. As Dave fell, he did a backbend and ended up on the floor with his neck touching the floor 45 degrees to his thigh (he was on his knees AT THE SAME TIME). Rush looked on the ground. "That must hurt..."

At the next turn, the Gates of Hell used Pandemonium to bring Dave back.

As Dave rushed toward Rush, Rush parried a blow from another soldier of Dave's. "Did that back bend hurt you much when you got KOed?"

"Surprisingly, no!" Which was followed by Dave's blade slicing through Rush's neck, spewing out ridiculous amounts of blood, but Rush's clothes were perfectly clean.

As he collapsed into an illogical back bend, he turned to Blocter.

"I HATE this game."

o0o0o0o0o0o0o00o

**The Tale of Althum's two Sweethearts PART TWO: by Dave**

When Rush had read David's personal records, he fell on his knees to the ground, letting the gentle tome fall from his limp fingers. He became very upset, and gave a deep sigh of many winds. After a moment of pain within him, he arose, and continued reading.

In the subsequent days, Rush became more of a gentleman. When ever he saw Emmy, he would smile, but strangely, he treated the Marquis himself with a certain coldness which chilled the monarch to his bones. If he hadn't known the true reason, he might have been slightly cross.

The Marquis felt rather upset that his friend had reacted so badly to his true feelings toward his comrade, Emmy, but understood. After all, Rush was still male, with his need for affection and love from the opposite gender. David Nassau tried his best not to be jealous of his friend everytime Emmy smiled back at Rush, but he had to remind himself that Rush was his friend, and Emmy's heart had been pledged to him already.

The Marquis turned and watched as Rush plucked a flower from the garden and hid it in his pocket. He sighed.

Love...the most painful and yet most wonderful thing ever.

o0o0o0o

David Nassau placed down his pen and closed his diary. He watched as Rush walked over to Emmy, flower in hand. He sighed again.

**o0o0o0o0o0o**

**Yes, I'm still stuck at the Gates of Hell. My dad is actually quite the battle guy...he nearly helped me win...sigh.**

**Wish me luck, **_**Ganbatte!!!**_

_**REVIEW**_


	5. Tale of Athlum's Sweethearts III

**I have a review-obsession. Which is doubled by the fact that I lack them. Get my point? (hint hint)**

**The fact is, the more reviews I get, the faster I update! Which means, to you dumb brains who can't get my meaning, REVIEW!**

**This is the third instalment in the "Tale of Althum's Sweethearts", which I know I keep getting the title wrong, but I think you get my meaning. Its a DaveXEmmyXRush. A really interesting love triangle. Bwahahahaha!**

**Perlease, people! is Dave/Rush the ONLY pairing that's gonna be on this website?!**

**o0o0o0oo0o0o0o0o0o00o**

_**Tale of Athlum's Sweethearts: Part III**_

by: Emma Honeywell the Second aka Emmy.

Suddenly, Rush came to me while I was lounging (direct translation: Slacking) in the gardens, interrupting my joyful daydreams of the time I first met the Marquis of Athlum. He offered me a flower, and a charming smile.

Now to be honest, Rush is a pretty boy, and if I had met him first, I would probably have gone for him, but so it is been that fate brought me to fall for David.

So it really cut me deep within when I had to tell Rush that I was taken. I'd never seen a boy's face fall so far down. His chin nearly conked against the ground, but for the fact that it is not physically possible, also if it HAD conked against the ground, I would have laughed in his face, leading him to...i dunno, go all emotional and 'accidentally fall off a cliff'?!

I'm not daft. I realised that he had been hounding after my attention for weeks now. In those past weeks, I tried my best to ignore that needy puppy look he had, but failed to resist his slightly girlish, rather cute looking face.

After the 'confession', I suddenly thought up of an idea.

"Rush..." I called after his retreating, crestfallen back.

He immediately perked up. It was almost hilarious, like a plant that has wilted to near death, and suddenly you plop in some seagull crap and it straightens like a soldier at attention.

"Emmy?"

"Uhm, I was just thinking the other day, that a friend of mine requested that I put on a show for her birthday party. Would you like to star in the show? Oh, by the way, she's single and rather gorgeous..."

Hmm, I suppose Rush might have been interested to find a new girlfriend instead of me, so he perked up even more, spun around, practically _shunpo_ed toward me, with that 'eager adorable puppy look' on his face.

I felt so bad.

o0o0o0o0o0oo0o0o0o0o00o

_**third person POV now!**_

"This...is...," Rush muttered under his breath.

"...RIDICULOUS!' David completed his sentence, his face blushing furiously and hunching over in embarrassment.

Emmy smiled. "Aww, c'mon guys! You look _such _a perfect pair!"

"When I agreed to acting in the play, I hadn't said I was going to CROSS BLIDDY EFFING DRESS, ESPECIALLY IN A SPEGHETTI STRAPPED BALL DRESS WITH PINK LACE!!!" Rush screamed.

David couldn't help but grin evilly behind a hand. At least he just had to act as Rush's boyfriend, and at least he got to be a _guy_. But the fact that he had to act gay still hit a major blow to his male ego.

He immediately sobered up when Emmy handed him a purple flower. _Déjà vu, _it was the same type of flower he had given to Rush in chapter one.

_Which probably meant this was some Rush/Dave fangirl's dream._ David resisted the urge to drop the flower and stomp on it, release Gae Bolg on it, then pass it to Rush so Rush could unleash Omnistrike on it.

But he couldn't, so he had to satisfy himself with these violent thoughts within his head.

"Alright! Bringing out our special drama production directed by Emmy Honeywell..."Tale of Athlum's Sweethearts'!"

Emmy rushed back into the tent behind the stage, an shoved the two unfortunate, utterly embarrassed, utterly straight, utterly resolved to murder Emmy if not for the fact that they both loved/had a crush on her.

Rush and David stood there side by side on the stage staring at the twenty or so insane yaoi fangirls staring back hopefully for some live action. David never ever got stage fright, since he usually had to give speeches to large audiences, being the Marquis and all. Rush, being a guy in a dress on stage, was shaking in his pants, and his legs were bending nervously under the skirt.

Emmy hissed from behind the curtains. "Get on with it!"

"Uh...uhh!"David gathered his thoughts. He cleared his throat. "Uh..uhm...my...uhh..uh...princess! Thine hand is...uh...too graceful for one as...uh..."

The numerous rabid yaoi fangirls at the foot of the stage screamed. "GET ON WITH IT!!!"

David looked uncertainly at Rush. Rush certainly did NOT want to be kissed by his friend, especially one who was a GUY. David could easily lead Athlum to independence with speeches, yet he could not stand against a bunch of insane girls. He decided to take things into his own hands.

He leaned to ward David. Dave, predictably, was shocked, and pretty much shaking in his pants. Was his friend really gay?!

Rush puckered his lips...leaned in...

The yaoi fangirls held their breaths...

Dave nearly fainted from shock...

...and Rush jerked back and kicked David into the audience. David did a horrible impression of a diver, squashing two fangirls. The shock sent the rest of the girls screaming and stepping back, leaving Rush with enough time to rip off his dress, (he was wearing his usual garb underneath) jump down the stage, grab a very dazed David by the arm roughly and pull him away, away from the insaneness of it all.

When they managed to flee to the palace, the two boys caught their breaths.

Rush calmed down. "Dave..."

David sighed. "Yes, Rush?"

Rush puffed one more exhausted breath. "Your girlfriend is INSANE."

David collapsed on the floor. "Yeah..."

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

**(David and Rush stroll into a room, and the sight of the author dancing side to side greets them.)**

**Dave: Lifiea Chancelot...**

**Lifiea (that's me): (ignores)**

**Rush: (walks up to Lifiea...whacks her head with the flat of his sword)**

**Lifiea: OUCH. but thanks!**

**Dave: Why are you so happy?**

**Lifiea: (breaks out into wide grin) I BEAT THE GATES OF HELLLLLLL!!!!**

**Rush: Yeah, that was one tough fight, eh?**

**Dave: But there is still that Jader or Ja...guy left to kill...**

**Lifiea:...I'm trying to ignore your efforts to dampen my mood.**

**Dave: And the fight wasn't that bad anyway.**

**Lifiea: THAT'S IT! (grabs Rush's sword) Gracias, Rush.**

**(tears after David, waving sword about) "YOU IDIOT! SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP!!!!"**

**Dave: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH**


	6. Last Opera part I

**long time no update!**

**Well, I figured I needed to help rid the fanfic section for Last Remnant of excessive DaveXRush, so I'm starting this new set in this series of strangeness.**

**Stay tuned!**

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

_**Act One: Strange Beginnings**_

Rush and Irina smiled as the holographic message from their parents faded as it ended.

"We're gonna see Mom again!!!" Rush grinned happily.

"You are SUCH a mommy's boy." Irina scoffed. "Whatever, I'm just glad we won't be so alone now."

"I am NOT a mommy's boy! I'M TELLING ON YOU WHEN WE SEE THEM LATER! Humph!"

"Uh...anyway, what could possibly happen between now and the time we see them that totally changes our lives and cause us to have a whole lot of adventure with a Marquis of Athlum and fight some big dude called the Conqueror? What could _possibly _go wrong?" Irina smiled.

Maybe it was pure coincidence, or maybe Irina just said the trigger phrase that started off the whole thing, but that's when that butt-ugly flaming Remnant fell from the sky, and grabbed Irina.

"AH!" she screamed in surprise.

Rush was knocked backward by hordes of monsters that appeared out of nowhere. "Waugh!!!"

"RUSH!" Irina screamed. Rush jumped up, and sucked in breath. "Release the mighty power of Rush Sykes!!!" he yelled.

"oh...no...." Irina whispered, as all witnessed the power of Rush's...

Irina clapped her hands over her ears. "NOOOOOOOO!!!!"

"Don't try to stop me! I can't keep it within me any longer! It's like...like a BURDEN! Do you KNOW how heavy it is to carry a BURDEN?! I...I must....I MUST...!!!"

Rush paused dramatically.

"I HAVE TO GO TO THE TOILET!!!"

Irina sweatdropped. The Remnant roared its fury.

"Well, that, and NOW I SHALL UNLEASH MY POWERRR!!!!"

Rush grabbed a piano and started playing.

_**Where is the moment we needed the most,**_

_**You kick up the leaves, and the magic is lost...**_

_**You tell me yours skies all fade to grey...**_

Irina looked up. "No, the sky looks red. Nice crimson, orange...

_**You tell me your passion's fadin' away**_

_**And you are being carried off....**_

The Remnant took flight. Irina screamed. A random monster casually noted that Rush had changed the lyrics.

"Rush you idiot SAVE MEEEE!!!"

Rush kicks away the piano bench, but continues singing.

_**You stand in the line just to hit a new low.**_

Rush whacked up monsters in a line, but as he punched the second a third held him down.

_**You fakin' a smile with the coffee you go...**_

_**You tell me your life's been way off line**_

_**You're fallin to pieces everytime**_

_**And I don't need no carryin' on....**_

"Got that right, Rush! GET THIS BLOODY REMNANT OFFA MEEEEEE!!!" Irina screamed as the Remnant swooped over the singing minstrel as he struggled under the monsters.

_**Cuz you had a bad day**_

_**You're taking one down**_

_**You sing a sad song just to turn it around.**_

_**You say you don't know, tell me don't lie**_

_**Put on a smile, and you go for a ride...**_

(Note that Irina is NOT enjoying her Remnant ride...)

_**You had a bad day, the camera don't lie**_

_**You're coming back down and you really don't mind**_

_**You had a bad day....**_

_**You had a bad day.**_

Rush snaps a picture of Irina screaming with his 5.2 megapixel handphone camera. Irina has given up.

And now because the author has forgotten the rest of the lyrics, she shall end this now.

"Uhoh, I forgot the rest of the lyrics!" Rush muttered. He felt dust flying around him. He looked up. He saw Irina shredding confetti over his head. "HOORAY! " read a piece of paper she dropped.

"Whatever. Let us END THIS NOW!!!"

Rush activated his Remnant...and I think you know the rest of the story.

Rush collapses on his knees. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!"

Irina stretches out her fingers helplessly, as the Remnant flew, flew far away.

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

**Songfic! Sorta.**

**AHAHAHAHA I changed the lyrics a bit, but I think you should be able to tell that its Daniel powter's Bad Day.**

**I sang it for an audition! XD**

**REVIEW!**


	7. Last Opera part II

**Yesyes, sue me for not updating. Not my fault my school has been trying to kill me.**

**Anyways, ON WITH THE OPERA!!!**

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

_Act One, Scene 4: In the throne room. _

_Cast: Rush Sykes, David Nassau, Emma HoneywelI, Torgal Kittiekins _(ahem. This completely false. ) _Blocter Tackytail and Pagus Toadstool._

Rush: I'm going to find my sister, and I don't care whether you guys wanna help me, or not! Yeah! I'm gonna, like, totally march out there, with my oversized Irina's sawblade/sword, and hack Irina's captors into little bite-sized pieces! Like, now! On my own! In the...big...warring...dangerous world. All alone. Yeah! Haha. Yup, totally. Alone.

David: Okay!_ Ganbatte_, Rush!

Rush: ...

_5 minutes later..._

Rush (who is now bruised, close to death, and gasping): Whydya call me back Dave? I was...totally close to finding Irina!

David: Really? Where?

Rush:....um...not in ...Athlum? Heh heh...

(Four Generals and Dave sweatdrop)

Rush: Alright! I admit. I suck! I can't find my sister!

David: That's alright, Rush. As a friend with the power of a Marquis, I shall stand by you and help you find your sister!

Rush: Really?

_David smiles, and nods to Blocter. Blocter grins, and flicks a light switch off. All the lights go off, only leaving Rush in a dim light in the middle of the room._

_Then, the lights flicker on, but only focusing on David, who is now standing on top of the raised platform, holding a microphone. _

Rush: (is stunned)

_Somewhere, an electric guitar strums._

David: _We are the lazy generation_

_No more standing out in line..._

_So good at wasting out time!_

Rush: Are you talking about how I wasted my time looking for Irina?

_Lights flicker on, and reveal Emma at a set of cool drums, and Blocter and Torgal with electric guitars, and Pagus at a keyboard._

David, jumping up and down: _We are the lazy generation,_

_We are the lazy generation,_

_We are the lazy generation..._

All (except Rush) :_ NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW!_

David, hops to Emma's side: _We are the lazy generation_

_We are the lazy generation, _(jumps to Blocter's side)

_We are the lazy generation_

All: _NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW!_

Emma: _Stand up and shout!_

_And we'll be there for you!_

All: _ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, LET'S GO!!!_

Emma: _We are the lazy generation_

_They call us the awesome mutations du-uh!!!_

_Don't you dare die on us now!_

_Nothing you do seems to matter now._

_With the Marquis like a silver platter, SPARKLES!!!!_

Rush: Dave sounds like a certain book character Irina's nuts about...some Edwardo Culleno doofus Sparkle pants. Ew.

Torgal: _Yeah you know just where we stand!_

_Stand up and shout, and we'll be there for you!_

All, including Rush, getting into the beat of the music: _Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, let's GOOOO!!!_

Rush: _Stand up and shout!_

_And we'll be there for you!_

All: _hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, LET'S GOOO!!!_

David, now walking down the steps toward Rush, who is dancing with Emma, and Torgal and Blocter playing the guitars and shaking next to out hero (thats Rush, not Dave, no matter how much you want him to be): _We are the lazy generation,_

_We are the lazy generation,_

_We are the lazy generation_

_NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW!_

Rush grins at Dave, who is dancing on the platform with the microphone stand like a cool rockstar.

Rush: _We are the lazy generation,_

_We are the lazy generation,_

_We are the lazy generation _

_NOW! NOW! NOW! NOW! _

The four Generals play their instruments, while grooving. David dances about, in a circle around Rush, while Rush dances on the spot. He seems to have forgotten all the original bits about his sister having been kidnapped by Hermeien. Actually he hasn't any clue it's Hermeien yet, but you do. Unless you haven't reached that bit in the game. But it's kinda obvious, don't you think?

Emma does a fancy beat on the drums, signalling the continue of the singing portion of the song.

David: _So STAND UP AND SHOUT, _

_and we'll be there for you!_

Everyone: Hey Hey Hey Hey Hey Hey, LETS GO!!!!

David: _Stand up and shout,_

_and we'll be there for you!_

Everyone: _Hey Hey Hey Hey Hey, LETS GOOO!!!_

_WE ARE THE LAZY GENERATION!_

_WE ARE THE LAZY GENERATION!_

_WE ARE THE LAZY GENERATION_

_NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW..._

Rush: **NOW!**

Blocter bends back slightly and finishes the song with a chord.

Everyone throws their instruments backstage. A cat's screeches go unnoticed.

Rush: That was awesome, Dave! What's that song called?

(Everyone sweatdrops. Apparently, he was not paying attention)

David: _The Lazy Generation, _by the F-Ups. Torgal edited it specially for you, because the original goes "you can stand and shout, we won't be there for you!" But we're quite the opposite, you think?

He assumes a very royal pose.

David: Stand up and shout...

David and Emma, and Torgal, and Pagus: and we'll be there for you!!!

Rush: ...(wipes eyes with a hanky)...thanks, guys!

And then they all lived happily ever after...putting aside the bits where they fight the bad guys, nearly get killed and Irina destroys the whole place. Yup, totally happy.

_The End._

**o0o00o0o0o0o0o0o00o**

**I heard that the song actually has the eff word somewhere around, but this version doesn't. It came from this Xbox game, Burnout 3 takedown, and this was the theme song. I sometimes wish Last Remnant had a theme song. If you played Tales of Vesperia, which was my previous obsession, the theme song was Ring a Bell by Bonnie Pink. It's a beautiful song, because it totally supports a straight pairing in the game! WOO HOO!!! YuriXEstelle FOREVER!!!**

**Oh dear, I suppose I should take the fangirlling to the right game.**

**DAVEXEMMY FOREVER!!! XD**

**...reviews?**


	8. Last Opera part III

**I went for a solar boat competition, but it rained. We lost, anywaes. XD**

**People say they want more chapters? Okay. But first, RAISE AWARENESS, STOP THE YAOI.**

**Okay, now on to the STUPIDITY! XDXDXD**

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o000o0o0o**

_Scene 4, Act 3. cast: Rush Sykes, David Nassau, extras 349, 1324, and 134._

David: I just came back from meeting Hermeien.

Rush: ...AAND?! Out with it, moron!

David: (eye twitches...did he just call me...) ...and your ...sister...is...with him.

Rush:...so...when can I expect the dowry? Hey, Hermeien's a Duke, right? If he's cheapskate my parents ain't gonna just give Irina to him like that you know.

David: ...

Rush:...oh, right. He probably doesn't like her _that _way. So, uh...

David: (sticks out hand with that flower Irina likes)

Rush: O.O

David: I found this there and ...

_Rush runs off, leaving David in the middle of the street standing with his hand outstretched with the flower in his had, looking like a ..you guessed it, MORON. Rush reappears with a guitar._

David: Oh...SHOOT....

extra 349, a random soldier standing on duty: WHAT?! SHOOT! (shoot rifle at nearby store. The bullet hits a jar, causing the stall owner to shout, causing a drunkard to scream, causing city wide mayhem, as acted out by many other extras.)

Rush: ooooooh......

_Here we are dear old friend  
you and I drunk again_

David: ...I haven't touched a drop of whiskey since...last christmas party...

_  
_Rush: _Laughs have been had and tears have been shed  
maybe the whiskey's gone to my head_

David:...hmm, I thought he had genuine compassion for his sister's plight...__

but if I were gay  
i would give you my heart

_(Rush starts walking closer to David)_

David:...O.O well that's okay..its...really...no, really. DON'T COME ANY CLOSER!

_(David squeaks as Rush leans in, but Rush jumps away, singing away)_

_  
_Rush: ..._and if I were gay  
you'd be my work of art  
and if I were gay  
we would swim in romance  
but I'm not gay  
so get your hand out of my pants_

David: Ew? My hands would never even WANT to go near your pants, Rush. EW. __

Rush: _its not that I don't care -I do  
I just don't see myself in you_

David: I am not a looking glass...duh!

_  
_Rush: _another time, another scene  
i'd be right behind you -if you know what i mean  
_

David: Believe it or not, Rush, I DON'T know what you mean. ARE YOU PAYING ANY ATTENTION TO ME?!

_  
Rush, totally ignoring Dave: cause if I were gay  
i would give you my soul  
and if i were gay  
i would give you my whole being  
and if i were gay  
we would tear down the walls  
but i'm not gay  
so wont you stop cupping my.. hand_

David: ...stop....singing...it's ...embarrassing. (Turns around and starts walking away)__

Rush, walking after Dave: _we've never hugged  
we've never kissed  
i've never been intimate with your fist_

David, looking down at his fist: I think I want to disinfect this thing. Torgal! I need to borrow your sword. Just chop it..here, at this nice angle. That should take the whole thing off painlessly.

_  
_Rush, handing Dave his sword: _but you have opened brand new doors  
get over here and drop your drawers_

Dave runs back to Athlum, brings his drawers and drops them in front of Rush. He says: You're cleaning that up for me later.

Rush:...so...get my meaning? I'm NOT gay.

David: ...great, same here.

Rush:...really? Oh, what a reLIEF!!! So...can I have that flower?

David: (eye twitches) You REALLY want that flower, Rush?

Rush: YES!!!!

David: you REAAAALLLY want this flower, Rush? (dangles flower in front of Rush)

Rush: (jumping up and down like Spongebob) YEEEESSSSSSSSSS!!!

David: (with an evil grin, smacks the flower across Rush's face, slams it on the floor, stomps on it repeatedly in his Doc Martens. He then steps back, spits on the remains like an uncle in a coffee shop, and laughs maniacally over it. Then he runs away)

Rush:...O.O

**o0o0o0o0o0o0o0o**

**I was looking for the If You Were Gay song but I ended up finding this If I were Gay song. It seems to fit just as well. And besides, everyone uses the If You Were Gay song. It's getting cliched.**

**And I HATE cliches.**

**REVIEW PLEASE**


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